Apologetic After The Storm

It was never my intention to play angel, then devil. I am who I am. Do what I do. Sometimes, I don't pay enough attention to what I SHOULD be doing.

I was reading something tonight about all the dimensions of communication and the correlation of balance. Due to my stifled physical communication and over-stimulation of mental, spiritual, and emotional stimulation, I'm off balance.

My issue is that I chose to relieve that tension at an innocent person's expense. Whether it was worth it or not doesn't even appeal to my remorseful nature. What's done is done. All damage aside, though, I am apologetic for it ONLY because someone got hurt.

Does that make me selfish or accomodating?

I tend to use my actions as a way to get things done while making sure everyone is appeased. I should actually alter my actions to still take care of business, but please me in a non-offensive way instead. But no matter, it seems like there will always be someone offset or suffering because of it and it's usually me.

On some real shit, like a confessional with no clergy -- a lushful admission with no liquor-- I won't be made to feel sorry. To say "I'm sorry," would mean that my character is sorry -- worthless, inadequate, a penny with a hole in it. I AM NOT SORRY, but I am apologetic.